看不見盡頭的路，你還會走下去嗎？

Life is an adventure and it’s not only sweet. Bitter memory is not easy but it’s still more worthy and memorable than no memory.

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在酷熱而緩慢的貨車上，我走過了地圖上筆直的一段二百公里顛簸不平的路。望著沒有柏油的路，前路只是一片黃土，一直延伸又一直縮小，直至地平線上變成了一點。在這荒涼的路上，沒看見過一隻動物在兩旁連綿無間斷但又看不出有任何變化的綠色植物之間走動過。就這樣過了十一個小時。你能想像自己坐在洗衣機加焗爐之中望著一幅沉悶風景畫十一個小時嗎？我不知道塵世間最痛苦的事是你沒有珍惜一段至真的愛情，還是在永恆的酷熱中，別無選擇地在看不到盡頭而又毫無變化的路上一直走下去。我想起西西弗斯。我慶幸西西弗斯不是我，我的盡頭是二百公里外的玻利維亞，但我望著身旁的貨車司機，想著他由這頭走到那頭，放下貨物，然後再由那頭走回這頭，又重新拿起貨物，如此永無休止地在苦悶鬱結的路上重覆走動直至永恆。我終於明白開車前他買了十二罐啤酒，然後一罐又一罐灌下肚時苦笑著跟我說「沒有這個我走不過這段他媽的路」的意思。他做到了西西弗斯之歌中的西西弗斯：若然諸神對你的懲罰是要你痛苦，你能夠反抗的方法就是改變自己的想法，拒絕痛苦，把自己灌醉，令自己能享受痛苦的駕駛過程來對抗你的命運。

my little airport – 西西弗斯之歌:
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=70gCdNUv6Vo]

Can you imagine yourself sitting in a washing machine and an oven, looking at an unimpressive landscape picture for 11 hours?

The truck journey to Bolivia from Chaco, north of Paraguay, is painfully dull, hot, bumpy, dusty and slow. But if I was given the choice again, I think I would do the same but not to pay US$40 to take a bus with air-con and a proper seat for 7 hours instead of 11. That may be an easy choice but it’s very likely just another normal bus ride without any special memory.

Life is an adventure and it’s not only sweet. Bitter memory is not easy but it’s still more worthy and memorable than no memory. Traveling means different thing to different people but getting a special memory from traveling is one of my ways to enrich my life experience. Not only this, as the saying goes, without sadness there is no happiness. If there’s no ups and downs in life, we are just alive but not living.

Definitely I’m glad that this hard journey is finished for now. I can’t imagine our nice and kind driver has to repeat the same journey again and again without end…